July 31, 2009

Dont you want some vodka to love?! and then suck their dick?

Dannie: knock knock
Julia: whos there?
Dannie: vodka
Julia: vodka who?
Dannie: knock knock
Julia: whos there?
Dannie: vodka
Julia: vodka who?
Dannie: knock knock
Julia: whos there?
Dannie: vodka
Julia: vodka who?
Dannie: knock knock
Julia: whos there?
Dannie: vodka
Julia: vodka who?
Dannie: knock knock
Julia: whos there?
Dannie: vodka
Julia: vodka who?
Dannie: knock knock
Julia: whos there?
Dannie: orange
Julia: orange who?
Dannie: orange you glad i said vodka so many times?
Julia: fuck yes I am

Our Inspiration:


Dannie: and then we need to make a post about how bad we want to fuck him.
Dannie: :0 Julia: its all you baby
Dannie: NICE.
Dannie: hahaha.
Dannie: are we not gonna have a threesome anymore?
Julia: no totatlly
Julia: I'm just a busy beaver
Julia: pun intended

Adam won't share his jew gold

This is why my brothers girlfriend is my favorite and better than him.........

"and he is mad at me for telling him i dont want anything from him anymore...
i called him and he was like WHAT DO YOU WANT I THOUGHT YOU DIDNT WANT ANYTHING ANYMORE
i was like i have to go pee brb
and never called him back
lol"

July 29, 2009

I'd have to fuck you on principle.

Julia Coolia: i havent gotten any since last firday and I was mostly asleep.

Dannie Dead: that sucks. if i had a dick...a small one...id totally do you. haha

i wouldnt want to hurt you with my giant dick.

but im pretty sure if i had a dick, it would be ENORMOUS.

and id slap people in the face with it.

and pee on EVERYTHING. haha

July 27, 2009

wat u doin yesterday?

I'm amazed I've kept him going this long. it looks like a lot but it's not. Trust me, worth the read.





-------------------------
wierd dude:
7/27/2009 1:29 PM
hi

Julia: 1:35 PM
owl

wierd dude:
1:35 PM
wat u doin?

me:
1:36 PM
apple

wierd dude:
1:36 PM
huh
u home?


me:
1:39 PM
chop chop

wierd dude:
1:40 PM
u have msn?
1:41 PM
?

me:
1:42 PM
i have abc

wierd dude:
1:42 PM
wats tat mean?
wats ur email?
1:44 PM
?

Me:
1:51 PM
two@sleepysleepy.com

wierd dude:
1:51 PM
u online?

me:
1:53 PM
no

wierd dude:
1:53 PM
why not

me:
1:54 PM
i have aids

wierd dude:
2:00 PM
realy

me:
2:04 PM
really really
thats aids blood in my pictur

wierd dude:
2:08 PM
realy

me:
2:09 PM
reallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly

wierd dude:
2:09 PM
reallllyy
wat u doin?
miss me?

me:
2:09 PM
being dead

wierd dude:
2:09 PM
why?

me:
2:10 PM
cause I got murdered

wierd dude:
2:10 PM
how

me:
2:13 PM
with a knife

wierd dude:
2:13 PM
yep
need me help?

me:
2:14 PM
are you a pirate?

wierd dude:
2:15 PM
nope
2:18 PM
?

me:
2:19 PM
why

wierd dude:
2:19 PM
idk
u??

me:
2:22 PM
cause i'm dead dumbass

wierd dude:
2:28 PM
realy
log in on ur msn
plzzzzzzz

me:
2:30 PM
I only have ABC

wierd dude:
2:30 PM
wtas tat?

me:
2:30 PM
why the fuck are you so MSNcentric?

wierd dude:
2:30 PM
wat
nothin
wat u doin?
u have new pic?
2:37 PM
?

me:
2:43 PM
http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb224/dbarsne/old20lady20with20naughty20ooooooh20.jpg
wierd dude:
2:49 PM
tats gay

Me:
2:51 PM
octopus?

wierd dude:
2:52 PM
nope
u?

me:
2:53 PM
tats arent gay

wierd dude:
2:53 PM
yep
u have bf?

me:
2:59 PM
I have a dh

wierd dude:
3:07 PM
huh
3:10 PM
huh
3:31 PM
eh
Nue Xiong appears to be offline
Send Mail Add Comment

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

u have??-----------------

Original Message -----------------From: Julia CooliaTo: Cnue Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:26 PMSubject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
Tattoos ARE cool!

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: CnueTo: Julia Coolia Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:20 PMSubject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
tats kool

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Julia CooliaTo: Cnue Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:19 PMSubject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
turtle nipple nick nack tally wack give a chicken a porpoise.

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: CnueTo: Julia Coolia Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:17 PMSubject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
yep

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Julia CooliaTo: Cnue Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:15 PMSubject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
whatever you say I am.

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: CnueTo: Julia Coolia Date: Jul 27, 2009 1:42 PMSubject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
im

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Julia CooliaTo: Cnue Date: Jul 27, 2009 9:18 AMSubject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
I thought you were my stalker....

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: CnueTo: Julia Coolia Date: Jul 27, 2009 6:28 AMSubject: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
u single?

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Julia CooliaDate: Jul 27, 2009 3:48 AM
arkansas

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: CnueDate: Jul 27, 2009 2:34 AM
yes

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Julia CooliaTo: Cnue Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:32 PMSubject: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
no

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: CnueDate: Jul 27, 2009 2:31 AM
and...

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Julia CooliaTo: Cnue Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:30 PMSubject: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: k
neuchee coochie coo

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: CnueDate: Jul 27, 2009 2:29 AM
nuechee with his friend julia

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Julia CooliaTo: Cnue Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:23 PMSubject: Re: RE: Re: k
a boy name

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: CnueDate: Jul 27, 2009 2:19 AM
a girl name...

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Julia CooliaTo: Cnue Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:04 PMSubject: Re: k
once upon a time....

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: CnueDate: Jul 26, 2009 11:12 PM
wanna teach me about ur self?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


idk
wats it?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:27 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


ya know what I like? Using the letter "h"

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:20 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


wat

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:19 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


sheeeeeeeeeep!

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:18 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


me you

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:16 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


you me.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 27, 2009 1:43 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


to me

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 10:31 AM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


today

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 26, 2009 2:58 PM
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


from?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 26, 2009 9:55 PM

time travel

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 8:18 PM

wat u doin yesterday?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 26, 2009 8:15 PM

i have a row boat

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:35 PM

eh u have a car?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:57 AM


Please come to my house right now. I awnt to fuck you. I live at 1443 broderick in san francisco. please. Im so drunk and I want you. ask for jake. its my nickname.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 25, 2009 9:24 AM
Subject: Re: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


me too

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 25, 2009 9:56 AM

i would very much like to drink fine spirits from your butt hole.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 25, 2009 2:23 AM

so can i b ur friend?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 8:15 PM

roadkill

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 12:39 PM
Subject: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


u like ur work?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 6:19 PM

pineapple

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 11:11 AM
Subject: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


im jk

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 6:09 PM

yes.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 11:09 AM
Subject: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


no

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 6:05 PM

no. you're the shittiest stalker ever. goodbye.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 10:54 AM
Subject: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


n a house

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 5:48 PM

thats hella creepy. Where do i work then?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 10:22 AM
Subject: Re: RE: Re: RE: k


yep

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 24, 2009 4:23 PM


You know all my info? are you stalking me?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 23, 2009 9:01 PM
Subject: RE: Re: RE: k


i kno all ur info.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 23, 2009 3:08 PM
Subject: RE: Re: RE: k


Why do you want to know where I live when you dont know my name?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 23, 2009 3:01 PM
Subject: Re: RE: k


yep...realy realy...so where u from?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 23, 2009 9:51 PM

its above and below my picture, its all over my profile. really????? ....really??????

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 23, 2009 2:25 PM
Subject: k


wats ur name?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


how tall r u??

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:28 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


taw

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:21 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


wat

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:19 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


cause you died a virgin.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:19 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k



why
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:18 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


that sucks.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:17 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


me too

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:15 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


cause i'm a ghost.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 27, 2009 1:42 PM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


why u alway say tat??

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 9:18 AM
Subject: RE: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


spook?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
To: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 27, 2009 6:27 AM
Subject: Re: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


oook

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 27, 2009 3:47 AM

to have

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:32 AM

u have??

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:32 PM
Subject: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


i have abc

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:30 AM

eh u have msn??

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:25 PM
Subject: Re: RE: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


you know i got it!

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:21 AM

wat u say??

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:20 PM
Subject: Re: RE: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


light bulb watts?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 27, 2009 2:18 AM

wat

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
To: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 7:02 PM
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: k


shernipple

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 11:12 PM

is tat ur?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 26, 2009 11:01 PM

thats really sweet. if u find a human finger in there save it 4 me, k?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 10:43 PM

yep

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 26, 2009 10:35 PM

ya, i just shit the bed. can u clean it up?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 10:30 PM

need help?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Julia Coolia
Date: Jul 26, 2009 10:22 PM

its pink

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Cnue
Date: Jul 26, 2009 9:59 PM

hows ur day?

July 21, 2009

Cum Dumpster

Julia:
so you killed a baby?
……………………………………………………………………
Hella:
DUDE.
ok...
good story.
……………………………………………………………………
Julia:
you're full of good stories today
……………………………………………………………………
Hella:
this morning, my moms secretary came in and PUBLICALLY announced that she let her bf jizz inside of her last night and she was scared she was preggers so ive been calling her baby killed (cause she took the morning after pill) and cum dumpster. haha
killer*
……………………………………………………………………
Julia:
hahahahahaha
magical!
……………………………………………………………………
Hella:
RIGHT.
im such a dick.
……………………………………………………………………
Julia:
thats why i love you
……………………………………………………………………
Hella:
now anytime she says ANYTHING im like "oh, its cause you killed a baby" or "you were too busy killling babies"
hahah
……………………………………………………………………
Julia:
lmao
thats awesome.
babies scare me!!!
……………………………………………………………………
Hella:
which i realy dont care. morning after pill it up if your gonna, but why did she let him jizz in her in the first place if she didnt wanna kid. she said it was cause she "loves him" but i was like dude...you dont say "babe i love you, jizz inside of me" you say "babe, i love you, but pull the fuck out, i dont want kids right now"
HAHA.
and i love babies, i cant wait to make hundreds of them. haha
……………………………………………………………………
Hella:
im full of good shit today, but not cum
……………………………………………………………………
3:07 PMJulia:
hahaha
yeah. I want babies one day. but the thought of babies in 9 months is scary as sheeeeeeet!
……………………………………………………………………
Hella:
haha no no no. id totally go home TONIGHT and make a baby if i could. with anyone who would give me their seed. haha
……………………………………………………………………
Julia:
haha you are crazy woman!

"Yea, like id fuck THAT guy" and the history of Dannie's lineage

Dannie: i just realized in my picture i have like the worlds largest hook nose. haha

Julia: oh you do not
shushhhhhh

Dannie: haha I SURE DO!

Julia: not as big as my jew nose

Dannie: no no no. my jew nose murders your jew nose.

Julia: you're not a jew you liarface

Dannie: IM SUCH A JEW.
hahah i never told you my theory on my jewness??
oh this is a good story. sit back. kick up your feet. haha.
Soooooo....my WHOLE family has straight hair. Like EVERYONE there is no one with curly hair. I have a crazy frizzy little fro. Also, everyone in my family has a cute little sloped nose with no bump...i have a HUGE hook nose with a huge bump in the middle. So I start questioing my mother about who my real father is, and I decide that my dad is not my real dad, but in fact I have a dad that is a jew, and hes out there somewhere and Ive been on the hunt for my jew daddy for a few months now. Sometimes Ill just be walking down the street, see a jew, and run up to him asking if hes my jew daddy. no luck yet. I think he must look something like this:http://images.whereilive.com.au/images/uploads/86d3767bfd7da1bcd67e244ad65aabdd_resized.JPG
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH

Julia: hahahha you are crazy and I love you
My real dad's name is Pin Chang

Dannie: HAHAHAHAHAH. dude. i made myself laugh SO fucking hard while writing that.
and now your dad is a gook.

Julia: he is. he lived with my parents for a while. we've all come to terms. I would just like to meet my foreign exchange student father.
OH! maybe we're related by your jewdom!

Dannie: DUDE. its really possible. and this needs to be on weiner talk. asap.

Julia: illl get on it!

Dannie: hahah.
thats the best story ever. i just read it to my mom and she was like "yea, like id fuck THAT guy" haha